Alive
by Jack E. Peace
Summary: [AU] (Set "White Rabbit") When Kate found Sawyer at his hiding spot, they were alone. And she realized that her hatred for him could be put to better use. (KS)


Disclaimer: Yesterday I went out and I held J.J. at gun point until he declared me the legal owner of everyone on _Lost_. So I then headed down to the island and sang _Home on the Range _with the cast members around the burning plane only to find out the next morning that...I really don't own any of the characters.

A/N: So, I'm writing this story mainly for my best friend (Lucie Brody, you should read her stuff) because she thought it would be a good story. I hope she's right. This story is a lot different from anything I've ever written; it's pretty much a no-holds-barred story and if you don't like that sort of thing, don't read it. Now, this story is an AU, set when Kate tackled Sawyer after she found him at his hide-away. Review and please enjoy.

Kate Erickson swallowed the almost bestial cry that threatened to escape from her throat as she launched herself at Sawyer Hall, who was kneeling with his back to her, totally unprepared. Her sudden weight against his body threw Sawyer so off guard that he crashed to the sandy ground, catching a mouth full of sand and crumpled leaves. Kate grunted as she managed to keep her balance, forcing herself to remain on Sawyer's chest, knowing that if he escaped her then he'd go tearing through the woods and she wouldn't have the chance to confront him about the water.

Sawyer coughed and blinked, pulling his eyes back into focus and staring up at the angry face of Kate. Her sun-tanned face was screwed in an angry scowl, glaring at him as if he were the anti-Christ, with her curls twisting across her cheeks. Not for the first time, Sawyer was struck by how beautiful she was but suddenly, her beauty was something more then that; it was earthy and, at the same time, angelic and he realized how much he wanted her. It was nothing but lust and Sawyer knew it but he didn't much care; it didn't seem relevant at the moment.

Kate didn't give him much of a chance to study her any further, because she slammed her hands down on his shoulders, forcing Sawyer back into the sand. "Where's the water?" She snapped, her voice laced with malice.

Sawyer gave her as crooked a grin as he could manage at the moment. "I've been waiting a long time for this." He informed her, completely blowing off her question about the water. He had no idea what she was talking about either but it was just another thing that didn't seem relevant in his mind at that moment.

Kate looked at him, perplexed. "What?" She questioned, some of the fire disappearing from her eyes at that moment. "What are you talking about?"

Without giving her the answer she was looking for, Sawyer moved suddenly, easily catching her off-guard in her confusion. He tossed Kate to the ground with as much force as she had tackled him, causing the wind to be knocked out of her lungs in an audible _oof_. Before Kate could recover herself, Sawyer was on top of her, straddling her skinny hips and pinning her arms to the sand, grinning wolfishly at her. "That's better." He said. He always preferred the top.

Kate grunted as she struggled beneath Sawyer, attempting to find purchase on his arms with her nailed fingers, though this action was in vain. With a frustrated, almost exhausted, grunt, she commanded, "Get off me."

Sawyer continued to grin, peering into her brown eyes and wondering if that little flash of fear had just been his imagination. Could it be? Kate afraid of him and what he might do? Normally, that thought would have appalled him for, if he was nothing else, he was at least a gentleman when it came to situations like that; if Kate honestly thought that he was about to rape her, then he would have let her up for the very thought disgusted him. No one ever said he didn't have a least one moral.

But Sawyer didn't move, didn't reluctantly let his trashing prisoner lose because there was something more then fear that he saw in Kate's eyes just then. It was almost desire, the sort of desire that could never spoken aloud because it was so unheard of, so unclean that it was best kept secret. Was that what he saw in Kate's eyes? The thrill of being beneath him?

"Aw, c'mon Freckles." Sawyer feigned disappointment. "You mean to tell me you're not having fun?"

Kate sneered at him, resuming her thrashing, arching her body in an attempt to throw Sawyer off balance and off of her. Once again, her actions were in vain and Sawyer just kept grinning at her, that grin that she found both unsettling and sexy. The grin that reminded her how much fun it was to be bad.

"Yeah right, asshole." Kate snapped in response to his comment. "Get off me." Her words carried less force this time for she was hot and she was tired and, though she would never admit it, actually a little turned on by her current situation. She had always been the type of girl to like guys that took the initiative, which was the only flaw she could find when it came to Jack. Nice guys were good in the real world but it still made her heart pound when the moment wasn't about being good.

Sawyer rolled his eyes and continued to grin at her, his hands holding her sweaty and sandy wrists to the ground. Kate turned her head and took a bite at his arms, her teeth grazing his skin and doing the unthinkable: sending shivers through her body. _What is wrong with you_? Kate asked herself, stunned by her behavior. _This guy is a total asshole, what are you thinking_? That was a question she couldn't really answer.

"I see." Sawyer mused, lowering his head until his nose was just inches away from Kate's. "You like it rough." He took a little nip at her nose, though his action fell short, leaving him snapping at air with a grin on his face.

Kate forced her thoughts to turn away from Sawyer and back to the prospect of getting away from him. But was that what she really wanted? She wanted to think so, but it was becoming more and more clouded in her mind. "You're disgusting." She snapped. "I'm giving you one last chance: get off me."

Sawyer looked amused by the prospect. "Or you'll do what?" He questioned. "I doesn't seem like you can do much, sugar."

Kate twisted her wrist and managed to free herself from Sawyer's grasp, pushing on his shoulder with her free arm. Sawyer allowed himself to be rolled to the ground, still grinning that grin, holding up his hands in defeat. "All right, Freckles." He consented in that cocky, faint accent of his. "You win."

Unsure of just what had driven her to move, Kate forced Sawyer on his back once more, kissing him roughly on the lips before either one of them could react. Her hair fell past her face, obscuring Sawyer's surprised eyes, not that she would have seen them anyway; she had her own eyes squeezed shut tightly. Still managing to keep the grin on his face, even as he returned her kiss, deepening the gesture, Sawyer grabbed a handful of Kate's twisted locks and pulled her closer to him.

Kate felt her fingers tighten around his shoulders until her nails were digging into his skin as she allowed Sawyer's hands to yank her by the curls. His hands quickly left her hair and roamed across her back, fingering her spine, which was clearly defined in the way she had unconsciously arched her back. His hands didn't hesitate to trail down even farther, past her bony hips and to her butt, which he gave a firm, but somehow, gentle slap.

"Mr. Hall." Kate said coyly when she suddenly broke the kiss, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. "Watch your hands."

Sawyer gave her a mock chastised look and promptly removed his hands. "Beg your pardon, ma'am." He said, his southern accent suddenly growing thick as he winked at her. Kate half expected him to go 'ah, shucks' but he didn't, keeping his Southern hick routine to a minimum.

And just as she asked, Sawyer found somewhere else for his hands to go and this time, Kate didn't argue as he let his sandy fingers wander to the hem of her shirt, inching it slowly upward. His rough, almost calloused, fingers felt good against her back and Kate liked the way he touched her with no hesitation. He wasn't the sort of guy to insist that he was taking advantage of his date whenever things got a little hot and heavy; Sawyer was the type of guy who knew what he wanted and knew when he had it. Kate almost hated herself for being yet another girl to grace Sawyer's bed, in a matter of speaking, but she didn't really care. It was one thing she and Sawyer had in common: desire and the urge to fulfill it.

But if you would have told Kate yesterday that she was going to allow Sawyer to rip her shirt over her head and toss it at the base of a twisted palm tree, she would have laughed from sunup to sundown. But she wasn't laughing now. In fact, she wasn't doing a lot of anything other then kissing Sawyer wherever her lips could reach. This wasn't high school, there was no need to be coy and kiss on the lips; anywhere was fair game and Kate liked it that way.

Obviously, Sawyer believed in the same rules that had just flitted through Kate's mind as he kissed her neck and her shoulders, his lips tracing the groove in her collar bone. She liked the way his shaggy hair tickled her now bare skin, covering her body with goose-bumps despite the heat. Her heart was banging inside her chest but it was a pleasant banging, of which she hadn't experienced recently; it was a mixture of fear and excitement running through her blood now. The fear of being caught and discovered -mostly by Jack, she knew- and the excitement of that possibility. Kate knew it was nice to feel alive again, to feel something past the constant need to survive and help others to the same. To live as opposed to being alive, to be rescued as opposed to being found.

And if Sawyer knew that she was just using him to feel those things again, he didn't let on. Kate didn't think he would mind anyway; she didn't think he would mind anything at the moment. At least, it didn't feel that way.

Sawyer bucked his hips and tossed Kate to the ground once more, grinning at her and rolling on top of her once more. Kate returned the grin, which was just as wolfish and sinister as his own, and allowed her shoulders to be forced into the hot and biting sand. Sawyer kissed down her chest, over the fabric of her bra and across her stomach, stopping only when he reached the top of her jeans. It was only then that the thought of protection entered Kate's mind; she had always been raised to be safe, that rule had been drummed into her head during her schooling but, at the moment, it suddenly didn't seem so important. Being alive wasn't about being safe, that was something she had learned recently and she didn't dare bring up the thought. Living on the edge was something Kate had been doing a lot recently and it was something she would continue doing, even now.

Kate arched her hips in an effort to help Sawyer pull away her jeans, which he did easily and efficiently. The saying _practice makes perfect _ran through her head and she grinned, smiling at her own private joke. It was difficult to take anything seriously anymore now that you were living hand-to-mouth on a seemingly deserted island, about to go to bed with the one person you despised more then anything. This wasn't about love, it was about living and lust and Kate desired the former and possessed plenty of the latter. At least, for the moment.

Without a word, Sawyer rid himself of his own sandy jeans and took her then without a look, without a thought. Kate kept that smile on her face as she allowed her shoulders to dig deeper into the sand, leaves and twigs becoming twisted in her hair. Her fingers curled and she was only vaguely aware that she was uttering pleased whimpering noises, trying to remember the last time she had felt so alive. From the sand digging into her back to...other sensations, she didn't think she had even been so aware of just living.

Within moments, the deed was done and Sawyer rolled onto his back beside Kate, looking at her with that grin that never seemed to leave his face, beads of sweat collected around his brow. Kate's breathing was heavy, swallow and she was sweating as well from two different types of heat but she managed to smile as well, pushing her matted hair off her cheeks. Pillow talk was something she had never been good at and she was thankful it wasn't necessary at a time like this.

Sawyer looked at her, that grin shining in his eyes as he slipped his jeans back on, getting to his feet. "You really are the new sheriff in town." He remarked with the right amount of seduction in his tone. And without another word or another glance in her direction, he headed back toward the beach, leaving Kate lying in the sand.

Kate didn't mind being left behind, for she really hadn't expected anything more from Sawyer. It was as close as they could get to a one-night stand and that was just fine with her; she didn't need anything more from him anyway because, for lack of a better term, he had served his purpose. For the first time in years, Kate felt alive again and that was all that mattered.


End file.
